Reflections on the week

Day 4 of a week of no husband and no kids. i've always fantasized about this space. What is it like living in my own house, working my job without the kids.
Things i realized:
• i don't rush to go home from work.
Which is kind of nice, but kind of depressing. It's sad to be at the office past 5 and sit there doing notes realizing that there is no one home waiting for me. Last night for the first night i went home to an empty house early. Other nights i had gone out with girlfriends. i realized, wow, it is lonely being a single person at night.
• i love sleeping alone.
i love my bed, i love knowing i am the only one in it, i love turning on the light in the middle of the night to read, i love blasting music when i wake up. i love bumbling around.
• i am messy by myself.
i don't make my bed, i leave the dishes, i leave the mail out. It brings me back to my days as a freshman college student and how my room mate of 4 years used to tell me i am so messy. You would never believe it when you see me run our home with the family in it. The power of " a good example".
•My family is everything
I had a client yesterday sit in my office and ponder how precious his family and God was to him. At the end of the day, that is his most precious possession. And i thought, i run my life pretty efficiently with my job and my self-care. i can't think of anything better to do with a couple of extra hours a day than to care for my family.
It's neat to come back to that realization after fantasizing about painting and writing and retreating. At the end of the day, the care and feeding of children and a family is worth it's weight in gold.